


i remembered

by isthatalittlebowtie (froggydarren)



Category: Glee
Genre: 5x15 reaction fic, M/M, canon violence, gay bashing reference, post-Bash, references to canon violence/assault
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-13
Updated: 2014-04-13
Packaged: 2018-01-19 06:29:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1459369
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/froggydarren/pseuds/isthatalittlebowtie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>They both heal, as the bruises and cuts do, but Blaine still wonders what it was that drove Kurt to run into the alley. 5x15 reaction fic, references to the assault from 5x15 and past gay bashing.</p>
            </blockquote>





	i remembered

They don’t talk about it much at first. Blaine is too elated and -- if he’s honest with himself -- clinging to Kurt’s strength as much as he can. And Kurt, Kurt just keeps going, like he always does. The attackers may have left him on the ground, but they didn’t defeat him, they didn’t break him.

It’s days before Blaine even thinks about more than “Kurt is okay, he’s fine, he’s _here_ ”. Then it’s another few days before he starts thinking of the _why_ of it. But once it crosses his mind, the thought doesn’t go away. He wants to know, but he’s afraid to ask, afraid to bring it up to Kurt. They’re fine now, Kurt’s cuts and bruises are healing, he stands up and blows everyone away with _I’m Still Here_. He takes Blaine’s breath away, as usual.

Blaine doesn’t ask, not until one night, when he’s staying at the loft and they’re in bed, Blaine’s fingertips tracing the vanishing bruises gently.

“It’s not going to stay,” Kurt whispers with a slightly disappointed tone.

“No, it’s not,” Blaine says back quietly.

He gets it, he knows that everyone else told Kurt that it was weird, wanting one of the cuts to leave a scar, to stay as a reminder. Blaine has his own, one gash that was a little too deep to heal completely, hidden on the inside of his thigh where only Kurt can see it nowadays. It’s a reminder, a mark of surviving. It doesn’t feel like a flaw anymore, not since Kurt has repeated often enough to Blaine that it’s a battle scar, a sign that he’s strong.

“I still wish it did,” Kurt mutters. “I won’t forget, but…”

“I know,” Blaine nods when Kurt doesn’t finish his thought.

They understand each other. It’s another thing that they have in common, one more bond, even if it is one that Blaine wishes that he carried alone.

“Why…” he starts, but his voice falters at first.

“Why did I do it?” Kurt finishes the question that Blaine fails to verbalize.

“Yeah,” Blaine nods, his voice still shaky and weak. “I kind of get it, but… but I think it was more than just you standing up to them because it’s what you do.”

“It was,” Kurt whispers and links his fingers with Blaine’s. “But it wasn’t. I think I’d have done the same no matter what, because that’s what Dad taught me, that’s how he raised me. To stand up to people like that, to fight, to _do_ something.”

“He’s so proud of you, you know?” Blaine smiles softly. “He wouldn’t shut up about you in the hospital or at the mid-winter critique. I think he talked you up more than you talked about me.”

“Impossible,” Kurt chuckles. “It’s not just him who made me be like this, though.”

Blaine doesn’t say anything, but lifts an eyebrow, curious.

“I thought… my first impulse was general. Someone was getting hurt, I was there, no one else was doing _anything_ ,” Kurt says, and then he pauses to take a breath. “But when I got closer I couldn’t help but think that… it had been you once. It could’ve been you again. No one helped you then and…”

Kurt stops, his hands and voice shaking, fingers curled tight around Blaine’s. He blinks a few times and looks into Blaine’s eyes, then speaks again before Blaine can say anything.

“I know it wasn’t you, I’m so glad it wasn’t, but I couldn’t _not_ remember what you told me about,” Kurt whispers. “You taught me to stand up for myself too, not just my Dad. You both did.”

“I love you,” Blaine whispers, at a loss for what else he can say.

 _Thank you_ doesn’t seem right, it wasn’t him in the alley, it wasn’t Kurt standing up to the guys who hurt Blaine all that time ago. _I know_ feels wrong to say, _I wish you hadn’t_ is something that Kurt already knows. They both carry the memories, their own and each other’s. Blaine doesn’t want to think of it as them being even, he does still wish he never had to see Kurt so small, so pale, so fragile in the hospital bed when Blaine felt at a complete loss, unable to do anything. He made a promise then, one that he knows he won’t be able to uphold all the time, but he made it nevertheless.

“I heard you, you know,” Kurt mumbles after a moment of silence. “In the hospital. I never said until now, but I did hear you.”

“The song?” Blaine asks and sees Kurt nod. “I meant it, I’m … I don’t know what it will take, but seeing you there like that...I don’t want to see you like that ever again,” he breathes out, his voice thick with the tears he’s trying to hold back.

“I’ll try not to,” Kurt smiles softly and leans closer, then brushes his lips over Blaine’s. “Promise me the same?”

“No more danger?” Blaine smirks weakly.

“No more _recklessness_ ,” Kurt nods.

Blaine knows it’s easier to promise that than to follow through. But right then and there, it’s enough.


End file.
